Last July, I wrote about what I've termed Platonic erotica - which basically involves approaching the erotic arts as art instead of pornography (a novel concept, I know). Society draws a hard line between all aspects of life that are non-sexual - and therefore appropriate matters for public discourse and display - and those that are sexual - which it cordons off and restricts access to with extreme prejudice. I've always been interested in the grey area between the two. We bend over backwards to deny the extent to which life is infused with sexuality, or else we end up condemning perfectly ordinary behaviors (like girls showing off their dance moves to internet strangers) because somebody somewhere might interpret them in a sexual way.
I was thinking about this while reading YouTube's rules on prohibited content - which make prodigious use of the phrase "meant to be sexually gratifying". Like, who cares if somebody gets their jollies from it so long as it's not actually depicting sex? Also, the extent to which they have to contort themselves into a backbend in order to make pointless exceptions for scientific use probably has them sitting on their own heads. I say pointless because intent doesn't matter - scientific manuals are no less explicit than pornography, and watching porn (no matter how unrealistic) will teach you more about sex than you'll ever learn in a science lab.
But a good piece of erotic art can accomplish the same thing, while doing it in a much more tasteful manner. The fact that we allow certain expressions and not others, over a completely arbitrary and meaningless distinction, destroys any argument that could be made about the unsuitability of the material in question to any given audience. All it does is pay nothing more substantial than lip service to an outdated (and unconstitutional) code of subjective moralism - one that glorifies deception, via the hollow facade of dispassionate academia.
Anyway, while I was reading those rules, I brainstormed a brief snippet explaining what I would call Platonic eroticism - which is allowing society to exhibit and admit to the presence of eroticism (implicit sexuality) in everyday public life. Because we don't need to prohibit a thing just because somebody somewhere might find it sexy.
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"Platonic eroticism" is fun, flirty behavior not intended to be the precursor to sexual intimacy (i.e., foreplay), that is designed around the general appreciation of sexual themes and cues in a social atmosphere, and not so much a mutual attraction between specific people. Its purpose is to emphasize the light-hearted playfulness of human sexuality, without the emotional weight of physical intimacy, and to take this activity out of the bedroom, to be shared among larger audiences. It does not involve explicit sexual acts, and its goal is not the satisfaction of personal desires. But it does acknowledge - with celebration, not guilt or shame - that sexuality permeates much more of our lives than the private moments we share with our committed lovers behind closed doors.
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At the end of the day, I don't necessarily want the world to be flooded with sexual media any more than most people would. It might bother me less than it would bother a lot of people, but that's still not my vision of utopia. Not least of which because we all have different tastes, and navigating to a random porn site doesn't necessarily mean you'll find something that appeals to you in the slightest.
I mean, I kind of do that on DeviantArt when I click on people's favorites pages; you never know what you're gonna find. If they're faving my pics (which is how I find them), the gallery is likely to include some kind of naughty material. Every once in a while, I'll find someone who has what I would describe as good taste, and that makes it all worthwhile. Most of the time it's just mundane smut of a more or less explicit variety (you'd be surprised what flies under the radar over there). Occasionally it'll be one of those collections guided by the compass of a rare fetish, that will make me grimace (no judgment - you do you). But even that doesn't scare me away from coming back and checking under the rock pretty much daily.
As I was saying, I don't want the world to be flooded with sexual media, I just want to be permitted to enjoy the sexy aspect of living - whether or not it's something that only exists in my head - without guilt and shame and censure. But the way we treat porn, especially on social media, means that even the slightest association with sexuality carries the world-shattering taint of eroticism. Instead of, you know, letting it be the cherry on top of life. I don't remember consenting to being bombarded with other people's sex-negative attitudes on a regular basis. Why do they always have to be out there spoiling everybody's fun?
